Alive
by ssara star
Summary: When Emilia woke up as Lucy Heartfilia, she promptly decided to kill herself. Sadly, fate wouldn't take any of that. (She woke up as Levy McGarden after that.) Complete One-Shot


Emilia did not have a normal life, thank you very much. She was a well-respected neurosurgeon with a loving wife and family. Nothing was average, and Emilia quite liked her life.

She died old and in a hospital bed, her wife having left a short nine months before her.

She closed her eyes.

And when Emilia opened them, she was someone entirely different.

 **LUCY HEARTFILIA?** _Why?_ Was all Emilia could think, waking up in the three-year-old's body. When she saw the flower vase nearby, she knew she had hit the jackpot.

In this world, Lucy Heartfilia died with glass shards poking out of her head in tasteful spikes, scarlet blood endlessly pooling out of the smiling, doll-like face.

 **LEVY MCGARDEN** was a bit harder, as her protective parents prevailed (despite never noticing her rather obvious insanity) until they permitted magical use.

Not a good idea.

In this world, Levy McGarden died right before her parents horrified eyes, a sickening smile as the word _metal_ hit her head with a dramatic crash.

 **EMILIA DECIDED** to give Cana Alberona a try. Granted, she was constantly avoided due to her strange delusions.

But, hey, at Fairy Tail, only friendship matters.

In this world, Cana Alberona died from alcohol poisoning at age ten. Fairy Tail now monitors alcohol consumption.

The saints.

 **NATSU DRAGNEEL** was an honest deal-breaker. Male. _Really, universe?_ Emilia yelled in her mind. The good thing was that Emilia didn't have to spend much time in the horrendous body of his. Only a day, actually.

In this world, Natsu Dragneel died in the same fire, but Emilia's soul was scorched instead. Natsu Dragneel returned as himself once revived.

 **WHEN EMILIA** became Sakura, she honestly thought the universe was bullshitting her. Really, consistency much? And, by making the stupid choice of not killing herself right away, Emilia was found out.

Honestly, just because Emilia had an adult mind didn't make her any better of an actor.

Thankfully, it was an idiot who caught her.

In this world, Sakura Haruno was killed with her throat cut up in a bright red smile, endlessly dripping scarlet tears.

 **EMILIA DIDN'T** really know who she began next

She still doesn't know.

Emilia thinks that she's going insane.

 **WHEN EMILIA** entered another body, she still wasn't aware. She noticed a glass shard nearing her heart.

It stopped.

Her pale hand was the one holding it, nearing towards her.

 _I don't… I don't understand?_ Emilia thought.

 _Why can't I die? Why… why can't I just die!_

Tears streamed down foreign cheeks as Emilia recalled the horror of her own life.

The shard was moving once again.

This one died and was never found.

 **EMELIA WAS-**

 **EMELIA IS-**

 **SHE DIDN'T** remember her own name as she banged her head on the bed frame.

 **EMELIA** was what she remembered as she slit her wrists.

 **HER CHILDREN** were simple blurs as bed sheets strangled her to sleep.

 **HER WIFE** could not be remembered. She saw a beautiful, deadpan, charming girl. She never remembered again as water consumed her.

 **EMILIA'S LAST** body was of Zeref Dragneel.

She remembered that when she couldn't kill herself.

She remembered her name for a moment to.

But then she thought of the moment she was Lucy, the year she was Levy, the seven years she was Cana, the day she was Natsu, the day she was Sakura…

First left Lucy, the doll-like girl.

Her porcelain face smashed,

 _She was never remembered again._

Then came Levy, and her parent's fierce protectiveness, despite their ignorance towards their own child.

She would have been great.

Her blood didn't need to be naturally metallic.

 _She was never remembered again._

Natsu and Sakura were just names.

 _Never to be remembered again._

Cana and her insanity lasted the longest.

 _But she was gone too._

The last the thought the boy under the tree truly had was a broken _Em..mi..lia?_

The boy lived forever, withering away with no mind no count the years, no soul to be filled with sorrow.

The boy lived forever.

Yet what is life without a soul?

* * *

Thank you for reading!

I am really interested in the concept of self-insertion, so I will probably approach it a lot, and it will also end up like this a lot.

Favorite, Review, I honestly don't care.

(Of course I care! Give me validation!)


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